Every Circumstance

I was once told, "You carry joy."  Actually, a number of people have made similar statements.  Now don't get me wrong.  I am generally full of optimism and happiness.  But I do have moments where it seems like the joy is gone from everything.  But when those moments come, I've realized that I can choose to continue to be full of joy.  Let's face it, it's Christ who gives me the joy in the first place.  One of the mysteries of God is that He never changes.  Which means my joy should never change.  Joy in each and every circumstance is a decision to trust in the Lord that He will provide for me.

At this point in my life, everything seems to be going right.  My life, you might say, is just about perfect.  I have so much to be thankful for:

I am finishing my senior year in college at a school that I love.  I have spent four years developing a passion for teaching, through my classes, relationships with professors, and student teaching in China!  And I am thrilled to be able to go out and use my passion in the professional world.

 I live with five wonderful women.  I have been friends with most of these ladies since my freshman year.  We have gone through ups and downs, and through each situation have grown closer to each other and closer to God.

I have a job lined up for next year!  In my search to follow God's will for my life, I applied to international schools all over Asia.  After months of praying and searching, I finally received a job that sounds perfect for me right now.  On March 25 I signed my very first big-girl contract.  I am going to be going to Jakarta, Indonesia to teach grade three at SPH International School.  So much excites me about this opportunity, and I am excited to see all that God has in store.

But while I have all this good going on that makes each day a blessing, I have moments which make me step back and remember that God is good even through pain.

On March 23, after a seven month struggle with cancer, my Pap-Pap entered his eternal dwelling place and is in the presence of his Creator.

I am blessed to have spend Christmas with him this year, knowing that his days here were limited.  We found out Christmas Eve that he would have to spend another night in the hospital.  His response, "Good thing I ordered breakfast for tomorrow!"  He was disappointed, but this positive attitude was so characteristic of him.  On Christmas, we waited hours for him to be discharged.  He finally was and we were able to have a wonderful time at home with him.

In the days leading up to his passing, he struggled with every breath.  As I received updates from my aunt during the week before, I was blown away and brought to tears as I realized the joy that he had up until his last moments.

"Dad us failing fast. but he is still sitting there reading the paper!"

"He is joking with everyone that comes in.  it is hysterical!"

"Struggling but so pleasant."

"He had visitors from the church tonight.  they were having so much fun you could hear them at the other end of the hall."

"Pap is amazing and still teaching us all so much."

"Breathing is slowing some.  when he wakes up he will breathe in heavenly air.  it is so hard to watch him labor.  we just keep talking about heaven."

Pap was surrounded by family as he lived his final moments.  They had just finished singing "Softly and Tenderly Jesus is Calling"  when he took his last breath.

I look back on all my time with him and cannot help but smile and laugh every time I remember anything about him.

Pap-Pap was always joking around and being goofy.

To give him a hug took a great deal of courage... because you would most likely get tickled.

He worked hard at everything he did which served as an example to our entire family.

This man of God has left such a legacy for my family.  He always loved, always forgave, always encouraged, always prayed.

Thank you Lord for blessing my life with such an amazing Pap.

Blessed be the Name of the Lord.